Economic progress is often used to measure a country's success. However, some people believe that other factors are more important in measuring a country's success. What other factors do you think can be used to measure a country's success? Do you think one factor is more important than others?

Part 1 (Academic)
6.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

In my opinion, many other factors exceptbesides economic progress can be used to measure a country's success. I think that the most important factor is people's happyiness and satisfaction with their lifves. First of all, economic progress idoes not always bring happyiness and satisfaction to people. For example, in many developed countries with strong economyies, people are often unhappy and stressed because of high pressure at work and a lack of free time for family and hobbies. They work long hours every day to earn money, but they don't have time to enjoy their lifeves. In contrast, in some less developed countries with weaker economyies, people may be more happyier because they have more time for family, friends, and hobbies, even if they have less money. Moreover, other factors such as education, healthcare, safety, and the environment are also very important for measuring a country's success. A country with a good education system can provide people with the knowledge and skills to improve their life quality of life. A country with a good healthcare system can ensure people stay healthy and live longer. A safe country with a low crime rate can make people feel secure and peaceful. AndFurthermore, a country with a clean environment and beautiful nature can provide people with fresh air and nice places to relax and enjoy life. All these factors can contribute to people's happyiness and satisfaction, which isare more important than just economic progress. In conclusion, I believe that happyiness and satisfaction of people isare the most important factors to measure a country's success. Economic progress is important, but it is not the only factor and does not always bring happyiness. Other factors such as education, healthcare, safety, and the environment are also very important and can contribute to people's happyiness and satisfaction, which is the ultimate goal of a successful country.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing various factors beyond economic progress that can measure a country's success, such as happiness, education, healthcare, safety, and environment. Key strengths include a clear structure with distinct paragraphs for each main idea and a relevant conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include grammatical accuracy, varied vocabulary, and smoother transitions between ideas. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving phrasing, and enhancing coherence with better transitions. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include providing specific examples or data to support claims and using a wider range of vocabulary. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and analytical style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay generally follows a logical structure, with clear paragraphs for each main idea. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother, and the use of cohesive devices could be more varied. For instance, using phrases like 'on the other hand' or 'furthermore' could enhance the flow of the argument. Improving the linking of ideas would strengthen coherence.
6.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay contains several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('economic progress is not always bring'), incorrect article usage ('a country success'), and awkward sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, these errors detract from the overall quality. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical accuracy and varying sentence structures.
6.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition (e.g., 'happiness' and 'satisfaction') and some awkward phrasing (e.g., 'a country success' should be 'a country's success'). The writer could benefit from using a wider range of vocabulary and more sophisticated expressions to convey their ideas more effectively.
6.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing various factors beyond economic progress that can measure a country's success, such as happiness, education, healthcare, safety, and environment. However, the argument could be more clearly structured, and the conclusion could better summarize the key points made. To improve, the writer could provide more specific examples or data to support their claims.
7.0

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