Education should be free to all people and should be paid for and managed by the government. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Part 2
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

I am agree that education should be free and the government should pay for it. Firstly, free education gives a chance to all the people in a country. Rich people can pay for school, but poor people cannot pay. If education is free, then poor people can also go and learn things. In my country, many people are poor and they don't go to school because they have no money. If the government pays for school, then more people will be educated. Secondly, the government should manage the education. They can make ensure that all schools are teaching good thingsvaluable content and have gooqualified teachers. GThe government can also make sure that all schools have the same level of education. If private companies manage schools, then some schools will be better than others. But ifHowever, if the government manages them, then all schools will be same level. maintain a similar standard. In conclusion, iI strongly agree that education should be free and managed by the government. This will help more people to be educated and make ensure that all schools are of the same level. GThe government should pay for education so that everyone can have the chance to learn and the country can develop.
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Expert Feedback

The essay presents a clear position in favour of free education managed by the government, which is a key strength. It effectively addresses the prompt and develops main ideas, particularly focusing on the benefits for poor people and the importance of government management. However, the argument could be strengthened with more detailed examples and a deeper exploration of potential counterarguments. Critical areas for improvement include the use of cohesive devices, as the essay had limited variety in linking words and phrases, which affected the overall flow. Additionally, there were several spelling errors and grammatical inaccuracies that detracted from the clarity of the writing. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving spelling, and enhancing the clarity of sentences. Transition phrases were added to improve coherence between paragraphs. For further improvements, the writer could incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and provide more specific examples to support their arguments. Additionally, addressing potential counterarguments would add depth to the discussion. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and persuasive style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances of repetition (e.g., 'goverment' and 'school'). Improving the variety of linking words and phrases would enhance the overall flow and clarity of the writing.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors, such as 'I am agree' (should be 'I agree') and issues with subject-verb agreement ('all school are teaching good things'). While the meaning is generally clear, improving grammatical accuracy and complexity would enhance the overall quality of the writing.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the topic, but there are several instances of repetition (e.g., 'goverment' and 'school'). Additionally, there are spelling errors ('goverment' should be 'government', 'dont' should be 'don't'). To improve, the writer could incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and ensure correct spelling.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by presenting a clear position in favor of free education managed by the government. It develops main ideas with relevant examples, particularly focusing on the benefits for poor people and the importance of government management. However, the argument could be strengthened with more detailed examples and a deeper exploration of potential counterarguments.
6.0

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