Fast food is becoming a part of life in many places. Some people think that it is having a bad effect on people's healthy lifestyle and diet. Do you agree or disagree?

Part 2
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

In this day and age, fast food has becominge more widespread. While it is seems convienient for people's lifves, some argues that fast food has brought bad aa negative effect on people's health and diets. I agree towith this statement. This essay will discuss my reasons. Firstly, fast food contains very high calories and often unhealthy ingrediaents. Fast food meals are vertypically high in fat, sugar, and salt. This can lead to obesity and other health problems like diabetes and heart disease for people that eatwho consume fast food a lotfrequently. Many peoples will eat fast food regularly because it is quick and easy, without realiszing the bad impact on theire health. Secondly, eating more fast food means people are less likely to cook healthy meals at home. When peoples become reliant ton fast food, they willdo not learn how to prepare nutritious meals for themselfves. This can have a long-term aeffect on their health and diet. It is important that people learn to cook with fresh, healthy ingredients, but this becomes difficult when fast food is so readily available. In conclusion, I agree that the rise of fast food has had a negative aeffect on people's health and diet. The high calorie content and lack of nutrients in fast food can cause serious health problems, and discourage people from cooking healthy meals at home. It is important that people are aware of these risks and try to limit theire fast food consumption for a healthier lifestyle.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position in agreement with the negative effects of fast food on health and diet. Key strengths include a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include the need for more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the consequences of fast food consumption. The use of cohesive devices was enhanced, and awkward phrasing was corrected to improve flow. Additionally, spelling errors and grammatical mistakes were addressed to enhance clarity and accuracy. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include incorporating specific statistics or studies related to fast food consumption and health outcomes to strengthen the argument further. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward phrasing that disrupt the flow. For example, phrases like 'this become difficult' should be corrected to 'this becomes difficult.' Improving the use of linking words and phrases would enhance the overall coherence.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures, but there are multiple errors in verb forms and subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'has becoming,' 'it is seems,' 'peoples lifes'). These errors affect clarity and accuracy. To improve, the writer should focus on using correct verb tenses and ensuring subject-verb agreement throughout the essay.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'convinient,' 'ingredents,' 'helth,' 'nutritius,' 'redily') that detract from the overall quality. Additionally, there is some repetition of words like 'peoples' and 'fast food.' To improve, the writer could incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and ensure correct spelling.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position in agreement with the negative effects of fast food on health and diet. However, the development of ideas could be improved with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the consequences. For instance, discussing specific statistics or studies related to fast food consumption and health outcomes would strengthen the argument.
6.0

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