If the world were to switch to using electric cars instead of all gasoline-powered vehicles, what would be the energy-related implications?

Part 2
6.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

If the world were to switch to electric cars instead of gasoline-powered cars. T, there would be profound energy-related impacts. This could hasve significant consequences for energy demand, infrastructure, and the environment. Firstly, the full transition to electric vehicles would lead to a massive rise in electricity demand. All the energy currently used for gasoline would need to come forom the electrical grid instead. The electriscity infrastructure in most countries is not yet prepared for this. It would requires massive investments and upgrades to handle the increased load from charging millions of EV batteries. Without proper planning, it could strain and overload existing power plants and transmission lines. Additionally, the environmental impact of this transition depends on how the extra electricity is being generated. If it is primarily coming from renewable sources like solar, wind, and hydro, it could significantly reduces carbon emissions and help combat climate change. However, if the added electricity demand is being met by burning more coal and natural gas, some of the environmental benefits of EVs may be offset. Ideally, the adoption of electric cars should happen in parallel with a transition to clean electricity production. In conclusion, while swithching to electric vehicles could have major benefits, it is not without challenges. Massively expanding electriscity infrastructure and clean energy generation in tandem will be crituical to realizing the full potential of this world-changing technological shift. Only with careful planning and poliscy can we power an electric vehicle future in a sustainable way.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the topic of switching to electric cars and discusses the energy-related implications with relevant examples. Key strengths include a clear position and the development of main ideas, particularly regarding electricity demand and environmental considerations. However, critical areas for improvement include enhancing the clarity of the introduction and conclusion, as well as addressing spelling and grammatical errors that detract from the overall quality. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving spelling, and ensuring proper paragraph structure. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include using a wider range of cohesive devices and synonyms to enhance the flow and variety of language. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and informative style.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay generally follows a logical structure, with clear paragraphs that each focus on a specific aspect of the topic. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother, and the use of cohesive devices could be improved. For instance, using phrases like 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand' could help clarify contrasting points more effectively.
6.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors, such as 'could has' instead of 'could have,' and 'it would requires' instead of 'it would require.' These errors affect clarity and accuracy. To improve, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement and ensure that verb forms are used correctly.
6.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate for the topic, with terms like 'electric vehicles,' 'infrastructure,' and 'renewable sources.' However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'electrisity,' 'incresed,' 'swithcing,' 'paralel,' 'planing,' 'polisy') that detract from the overall quality. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for spelling and consider using a wider range of synonyms to avoid repetition.
6.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the topic of switching to electric cars and discusses the energy-related implications effectively. It presents a clear position and develops main ideas with relevant examples, such as the impact on electricity demand and environmental considerations. However, the introduction could be more clearly articulated, and the conclusion could summarize the key points more effectively to enhance clarity.
7.0

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