In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of Artificial Intelligence? Provide examples to support your position.
Sample Essay with Corrections
Expert Feedback
The essay effectively addresses the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of Artificial Intelligence, providing relevant examples. Key strengths include a clear structure and the inclusion of specific examples to support points made. However, critical areas for improvement include grammatical accuracy, coherence, and lexical variety. The introduction has been clarified, and the conclusion now summarizes the main points more effectively. Transition phrases have been corrected and improved for better flow. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include expanding the range of vocabulary and refining sentence structures for greater sophistication. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective style throughout.
Detailed Scores
What this means:
The essay has a logical structure, but the flow of ideas could be improved. Some transitions between points are abrupt, and the use of cohesive devices is limited. For example, phrases like 'On the another hand' should be corrected to 'On the other hand.' To enhance coherence, the writer could use more linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
How to improve:
- Use a clear paragraph structure
- Connect ideas with appropriate linking words
- Maintain logical progression
- Use referencing effectively
What this means:
The essay contains several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('AI can helps'), incorrect verb forms ('solving' instead of 'solve'), and awkward constructions. While the writer demonstrates some range in sentence structures, the errors detract from overall clarity. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical accuracy and varying sentence structures.
How to improve:
- Use complex sentence structures
- Maintain grammatical accuracy
- Use a variety of sentence patterns
- Check for common grammar errors
What this means:
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition and awkward phrasing, such as 'more easier' and 'for doing more and more tasks.' The writer uses some relevant terms related to AI, but there is room for a wider range of vocabulary. To improve, the writer should aim to use synonyms and more sophisticated expressions.
How to improve:
- Use a wider range of vocabulary
- Demonstrate awareness of collocations
- Avoid word repetition
- Use more sophisticated vocabulary accurately
What this means:
The essay addresses the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of Artificial Intelligence, providing relevant examples. However, the introduction could be clearer, and the conclusion lacks a strong summary of the main points. To improve, the writer should ensure that each point is fully developed and clearly articulated.
How to improve:
- Address all parts of the task fully
- Support ideas with specific examples
- Develop each point thoroughly
- Stay relevant to the topic
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