Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

Part 2
7.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

In recent years, traffic congestion and air pollution have become more serious in many cities. Some people think that increasing petrol prices is the best way to solve these problems. I partly agree with this opinion, and I will explain why in this essay. On the one hand, making petrol more expensive could have some positive effects. Firstly, it would encourage people to use their cars less often, which would lead to fewer cars on the roads and therefore lessfewer traffic jams. Secondly, it might persuade more people to use public transport instead of driving, which would also help to reduce both traffic and pollution levels. On the other hand, I believe that there are other solutions which could be more effective than simply raising petrol prices. For example, governments could invest in better public transportation systems to make them more convenient and affordable for people to use. They could also introduce laws to limit the number of cars that each family can own, or restrict the use of cars in city centers. res. Additionally, implementing carpooling initiatives could further alleviate congestion and reduce emissions. In conclusion, while increasing the price of petrol might have some benefits, I believe that other measures could be more successful in dealing with the problems of growing traffic and pollution. If governments use a combination of different solutions, it might be possible to solve these issues in the future.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the potential benefits of increasing petrol prices and alternative solutions to traffic and pollution problems. Key strengths include a clear structure with a logical flow of ideas and appropriate use of cohesive devices. However, critical areas for improvement include the need for more specific examples or data to support claims, as well as enhancing lexical variety to avoid repetition. Minor grammatical errors were corrected, such as 'best way' to 'the best way' and 'less traffic jams' to 'fewer traffic jams.' Suggestions for further improvements not implemented include incorporating specific statistics or case studies to strengthen arguments and varying vocabulary further to enhance lexical resource. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Ideas are logically sequenced, and cohesive devices such as 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand' are effectively used to guide the reader through the argument. This contributes to a smooth flow of information.
8.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, with mostly accurate usage. There are minor errors, such as 'best way' which should be 'the best way,' and 'fewer cars on the roads and therefore less traffic jams' which should be 'fewer traffic jams.' These errors do not significantly impede understanding but do detract from overall accuracy.
7.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, with phrases like 'traffic congestion,' 'public transport,' and 'air pollution' demonstrating a good range. However, there is some repetition of terms such as 'traffic' and 'pollution,' which could be improved by using synonyms or paraphrasing to enhance lexical variety.
7.5
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the potential benefits of increasing petrol prices and alternative solutions to traffic and pollution problems. However, it could be improved by providing more specific examples or data to support the claims made, which would enhance the argument's depth and persuasiveness.
7.5

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