Is freedom of speech necessary in a free society? Give reasons for your answer.

Part 2
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

Today's world is a global village, and freedom of speecch is a very important topic. Everyone likes to live in a free society, but the debate is ongoing on ifabout whether freedom of speech is really necessariey. In my opeinion, it is a very important and required thing for the people to live freely and happyily. I will explain my reasons in the following paragraphs. First and foremost, freedom of speech allows people to share theire ideas and thoughts without fear. It is a basic human wrighte to express ourselfves and communicate with others. If people are not allowed to speeak freely, they will feel oppressed and unhappy. ItThis can lead to many problems in society, such as voiolence and crime. Furthermore, freedom of speech also helps to create a divierse and tolereant society where different viewpoints are respected. Secondly, freedom of speech is essential for the progress and development of sociaety. When people are free to express theire ideas, it leads to innovation and creativity. New ideas and inventions can emerjge that can benefit the whole society. For example, many scientific discoveries and teckhnological advancements have been made possible because of freedom of speech. If people were not allowed to share theire ideas freely, progress would be stopped. In conclusion, freedom of speech is a fundamental right that is necessary for a free and thriving society. It allows people to express themselfves, creates a tolereant and diverse environment, and promotes progress and development. Although there may be some limitations on freedom of speech to prevent harm, overall it is an essential aspect of a democratic sociaety. Without freedom of speech, people would feel oppressed, and society would stagnate.
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Expert Feedback

The essay presents a clear argument in favour of freedom of speech, effectively addressing the prompt. Key strengths include a logical structure and relevant examples that support the main points. However, critical areas for improvement include addressing spelling and grammatical errors, enhancing coherence with better transitions, and providing more specific examples to strengthen the argument. Structural changes made include correcting spelling errors, improving grammatical accuracy, and adding transitional phrases to enhance flow. For further improvements, the writer could explore counterarguments to provide a more balanced view and expand the vocabulary used to convey ideas more effectively. The tone of the essay is appropriate for an academic context, maintaining a formal and persuasive style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, with paragraphs dedicated to different points. However, the flow between ideas could be improved with better use of cohesive devices. For instance, transitions between sentences and paragraphs are somewhat abrupt. Using phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition' could enhance the coherence of the argument.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'allow people to share there ideas' should be 'their ideas'). These errors affect clarity and accuracy. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical correctness and varying sentence structures.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'specch', 'socity', 'opinion', 'happily', 'write', 'selfs', 'progrss', 'sociaty', 'inovation', 'emerje', 'scientfic', 'tecknological', 'stoped', 'necesary', 'tolerent', 'opressed', 'stagnat') that detract from the overall quality. The essay would benefit from a wider range of vocabulary and more precise word choices to convey ideas more effectively.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by arguing for the necessity of freedom of speech in a free society. It presents a clear position and develops main ideas with relevant examples, such as the impact on innovation and societal progress. However, the argument could be strengthened with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of counterarguments. Additionally, the essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion structure, which could enhance clarity.
6.0

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