It is generally believed that the Internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Part 2
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

It is widely accepted that the Internet is a very good way for communication. ButHowever, some people argue it may not greatbe the best place to search for information. This essay will discuss about both views and provide my own opinion. On the one hand, the Internet enablinges us to communicate effectively. It allowings us to stay connectinged with family and friends, no matter where they are in the world. We can easily send emails, messages, photos, and make video calls via ithe Internet. It has made our lifeves more convenient and efficient for communication. The Internet has bringought the world closer. On together. On the other hand, many people believe that the Internet is not always a reliable source for information. There areis a lot of fake news and misleading content online. It can be hard to distinguish between fact and fiction when searching on the Internet. Anyone can post anything onlinternet, soe, so the information may not always be accurate or trustworthy. In addition, there is also concern about privacy and security when searching for sensitive information online. In my view, while the Internet is an excellent tool for communication, we need to be more cautionus when using it to find information. I think it is important to verify information found online from multiple reliable sources. We should also be aware of potentioal risks and take steps to protect our privacy and security when searching online. Overall, iI believe that the Internet is a valuable resource, but we must use it responsibly and critically.
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Expert Feedback

The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the task by discussing both views regarding the Internet as a means of communication and a source of information. Key strengths include a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include grammatical accuracy, vocabulary range, and the development of ideas with specific examples. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving transitions, and enhancing clarity in sentences. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include incorporating specific examples of misinformation and using a wider range of vocabulary to avoid repetition. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow of ideas could be improved with better transitions and clearer connections between sentences. For instance, using cohesive devices like 'furthermore' or 'in addition' could enhance the logical progression of ideas.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay contains several grammatical errors, such as 'the Internet enabling us' instead of 'the Internet enables us,' and 'has bring' instead of 'has brought.' There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical accuracy and varying sentence structures.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition (e.g., 'Internet' and 'information'). Some phrases are awkwardly constructed, such as 'greatest place to search information' which should be 'the best place to find information.' To improve, the writer could incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and idiomatic expressions.
6.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views regarding the Internet as a means of communication and a source of information. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited, and the conclusion could be more robust. To improve, the writer could provide more specific examples to support their points, such as mentioning particular platforms or instances of misinformation.
6.0

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