My room at home You should write at least 150 words. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Describe your room at home. You should say: - where it is - what things it contains - what you do in your room and say how you feel about your room.

Part 1 (Academic)
6.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

I live in a house with my family, which is located in pPune, iIndia. My bedroom is inon the second floor of the house. I have had my own room since I was a teenager. I like my room very much because it gives me privacy and space for doing my work and hobbies. My room at home is very dear to me. It contanings a bed, of course, and also a desk where I do my studies. There is also a bookshelf with many books on it. I like reading very much, so I have a lot of books. I alsoAdditionally, I have a closet for keeping my clothes. My room is not big, but it is enough for mey personal space. In my room, I like toenjoy reading, as I saimentioned. I also study here and sometimes watch movies on my laptop. I alsohave been doing my online classes in my room since the pandemic began. My room is like my sanctuary,; I feeling very relaxed and comfortable here. I can spending many hours in my room and never getting bored. In conclusiong, my room is a very special place for me. It may be simple, but it haves everything I needing. I am grateful to have my own room where I can studying, relax, and be myself. My room is truly my castle, as the saying goinges!
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively describes the writer's room and conveys their feelings about it, which is a key strength. However, there are critical areas for improvement, particularly in grammatical accuracy and coherence. The original essay contained several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which have been corrected in the revised version. The structure has been maintained, with clear topic sentences and supporting details in each paragraph. Transition phrases have been added to improve the flow of ideas. Further improvements could include providing more vivid descriptions of the room's features and how they support the writer's activities, as well as varying the vocabulary to avoid repetition. The tone used is appropriate for the task, conveying a personal and reflective style that suits the subject matter.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, but the flow of ideas could be improved. Some sentences feel disjointed, and transitions between ideas are not always smooth. For example, the shift from describing the room to discussing activities could be better connected. Using more cohesive devices would enhance the overall coherence.
6.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay contains several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('it contaning', 'I also doing'), and incorrect word forms ('bookself', 'comfotable'). While the writer attempts to use a variety of sentence structures, the errors detract from the overall clarity. Focusing on grammatical accuracy and sentence construction would improve this score.
5.5
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition (e.g., 'my room', 'I like') and some awkward phrasing (e.g., 'I can spending'). The writer demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but incorporating more varied expressions and avoiding redundancy would strengthen the lexical resource.
6.5
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task by describing the room, its contents, and the writer's feelings about it. However, it lacks some detail and clarity in certain areas, such as the specific location of the room within the house. To improve, the writer could provide more vivid descriptions and examples of how the room supports their activities.
6.5

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