Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

What this means:

The essay has a logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing each problem, and a conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward phrasing that disrupt the flow (e.g., 'this encourage many people'). To improve coherence, the writer could use more varied linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.

How to improve:

• Use a clear paragraph structure
• Connect ideas with appropriate linking words
• Maintain logical progression
• Use referencing effectively

What this means:

The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'Overpopulation in cities have been cause'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'is make'), and missing articles. These errors affect clarity and accuracy. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical mistakes and varying sentence structures to demonstrate greater grammatical range.

How to improve:

• Use complex sentence structures
• Maintain grammatical accuracy
• Use a variety of sentence patterns
• Check for common grammar errors

What this means:

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'polution', 'goverments', 'cheeper', 'efficent', 'individals', 'environmentaly-friendly') that detract from the overall quality. The writer also relies on some repetitive phrases (e.g., 'traffic jam', 'goverments'). To enhance lexical resource, the writer should focus on using a wider range of vocabulary and ensuring correct spelling.

How to improve:

• Use a wider range of vocabulary
• Demonstrate awareness of collocations
• Avoid word repetition
• Use more sophisticated vocabulary accurately

What this means:

The essay addresses the task by identifying two serious problems related to overpopulation in urban areas: air pollution and traffic congestion. It provides relevant solutions for both individuals and governments. However, the development of ideas could be more thorough, with more specific examples and a clearer position on the importance of these issues. For improvement, the writer could elaborate on the consequences of these problems and provide more detailed examples of successful initiatives.

How to improve:

• Address all parts of the task fully
• Support ideas with specific examples
• Develop each point thoroughly
• Stay relevant to the topic