Some people believe that children at secondary school should be streamed, i.e. taught in classes according to ability, rather than being taught in mixed-ability classes. Do you think the advantages of streaming children at secondary school outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Part 2
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

In this essay, I discuss about streaming, which means putting students in classes depending ofn their ability. I think that streaming haves more advantages thean disadveantages, so I agree with this idea. There are someeveral reasons why I thinkbelieve streaming is goodbeneficial for students in secondary school. First of all, if stooudents with the same ability are in one class, it helps teachers to teach them more easierly. Teachers don not need to repeat information many times and don not need to wait for badweaker students, because all stooudents in the class have the same level of ability. Alsodditionally, teachers can giveassign more tasks to goodstronger students because good students can donthey can complete tasks faster. SoTherefore, streaming can help teachers in makingmake lessons more effective. Secondly, streaming makeallows students to learn wiat the same speed. In mixed-ability classes bad, weaker students can fiall behind because they cannot understuand the lesson fast. Other side goodquickly. On the other hand, stronger students can become bored when teachers repeat information for badweaker students. ButHowever, in streamed classes, all stooudents have a similar speed of learning, so they can study wiat the same speedpace and don not need to wait for other stoodents. In conclution, I thinks. Despite these advantages, it is important to consider the potential disadvantages of streaming. For instance, it may lead to a lack of social interaction between students of different abilities, which is crucial for developing teamwork and communication skills. Moreover, streaming can create a fixed mindset among students, where those placed in lower streams may feel discouraged and less motivated to improve. In conclusion, I believe that streaming has more positive aspects than negative thingones. It can help teachers to teach more effectively and can helpenable students to learn wiat the same speed. SoHowever, it is essential to address the potential drawbacks to ensure a balanced approach. Overall, I think streaming is a good idea for secondary schools and I agree that it should be usedshould be implemented with careful consideration of its implications.
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Expert Feedback

The essay presents a clear position in favour of streaming in secondary schools and discusses its advantages effectively. Key strengths include a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include the need for a more balanced view by addressing potential disadvantages of streaming, which was added in the revised version. The use of cohesive devices was enhanced, and spelling and grammatical errors were corrected to improve clarity and accuracy. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented include varying vocabulary further and incorporating more complex sentence structures. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is limited, and some transitions between ideas are abrupt. For instance, phrases like 'First of all' and 'Second' could be enhanced with more varied linking words. Improving the flow between ideas would enhance coherence.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates some grammatical range, but there are frequent errors that affect clarity, such as subject-verb agreement ('streaming have' should be 'streaming has') and incorrect verb forms ('can done' should be 'can do'). To improve, the writer should focus on grammatical accuracy and vary sentence structures to demonstrate a wider range.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several instances of repetition (e.g., 'students' and 'ability'). Additionally, there are spelling errors such as 'stoodents' (students), 'disadventages' (disadvantages), and 'understund' (understand). To improve, the writer should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary and ensure correct spelling.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing the advantages of streaming in secondary schools, presenting a clear position in favor of the idea. However, it lacks a balanced view as it does not adequately address potential disadvantages, which is essential for a comprehensive response. To improve, the writer could include a paragraph discussing the disadvantages of streaming and provide relevant examples.
6.0

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