Some people think that the design of newly constructed buildings in big cities should be controlled by governments. Others believe those who finance the construction of a building should be free to design it as they see fit. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Part 1 (Academic)
5.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

Nowadays, the argument about how much control of designver building odesign in big city own byies should be held by the government has become more interesting. Althought lot many people think the government should bhave control, but another peopleothers believe ithat freedom should giving to the people who finance the building constructedbe given to the individuals who finance the construction of buildings. I will discuss about both opinions below and give my opinion. provide my own view. On the one hand, if the government controllings the design, all of building will looks may end up looking the same. This can make a city lookappear boring and unot attractive. For example, if all buildings have the same colour and shape, like box, people who visites, visitors to the city willmay not be impressed and think city not might find it uninteresting. Moreover, if the government haves full control, they may not knows what design is best for the buildings. Maybe theyThey might choose cheap designs that look badpoor after some times. . On the other hand, let the people who give money for the buildingallowing the individuals who fund the construction havto have the freedom to choose theyir own designs can make a city look more interesting. Differentverse designs from different buildings can attract tourists to come and visit the city. Unique designs can also become icons of the city, like the Opera hHouse in Sydney or the Taj Mahal in Agra. Furthermore, the people who pay for the buildings must be know what design iss are suitable and good for the buildappealing. If the design is not good, people will not comevisit, and they investors will lose money. In my opinion, I believe the government should have some control inover the design of buildings in big cityies, but still give freedom to owner of buildingallow the owners the freedom to choose designs they like. Gprefer. The government can make rule aboutestablish rules regarding the size or height of buildings, but not control wholthe entire design. Building owners can chooseselect designs they like butwhile still follow rule from government. Withadhering to government regulations. In this way, big city willies can look interesting with different design of building but still neat and nice because have rule from governmentverse building designs while remaining neat and aesthetically pleasing due to government guidelines.
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Expert Feedback

The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the task by discussing both views regarding the control of building design in big cities. Key strengths include a structured approach with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include the need for more developed arguments and specific examples to support the points made. The structural changes made include rephrasing awkward sentences for clarity, correcting grammatical errors, and enhancing coherence with better transitions. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include incorporating a wider range of vocabulary and avoiding repetition. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow of ideas is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear transitions. For example, phrases like 'if government controlling the design' could be rephrased for clarity. To improve coherence, the writer should use more cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph logically connects to the next.
5.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a basic range of grammatical structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'government should be control' should be 'government should control'). While the meaning is generally clear, these errors detract from the overall quality. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical accuracy and varying sentence structures.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several instances of repetition and awkward word choices, such as 'intresting' instead of 'interesting' and 'fredom' instead of 'freedom.' The writer could enhance their lexical resource by incorporating a wider range of vocabulary and avoiding repetitive phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'design,' synonyms like 'architecture' or 'aesthetic' could be employed.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views regarding the control of building design in big cities. However, the arguments presented are somewhat underdeveloped and lack depth. For improvement, the writer could provide more specific examples and elaborate on the implications of each viewpoint. Additionally, the conclusion could be more clearly articulated to reinforce the writer's opinion.
5.5

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