The best way to get people to use their cars less is to make them pay a road toll to drive on busy roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Part 2
5.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

Pepople have been drivening their cars more for the lasin recent years than before in the past. This havves caused maniy problems like traffiic jams and the polluted airs. One way to reductione the use of cars areis to charged tolls for driveing on the busiest roads. However, I disagree that this is athe best way to encouraget people to use less car.cars less. Firstly, makeing people pay for tolls on the busy roads might not stop them from useing their cars. Maybe sSome people hasve enough money to pay any toll. For them, it doess not make any difference ifwhether there are tolls or no tolls on the roads they drive on. But for poorer pepople, they cannot afford to pay extra money forto use the righte roads. This is unfair for different people with differentvarying incomes. The rich and poor should have the same rites forghts to use roads for which they allredady pay taxes. MakImplementing tolls on only busy roads will maklikely cause traffic jams on other roads where there are no tolls charaged. Everyone will crowd up inonto the available roads if they want to avoided paying extra money. So theTherefore, tolls will not solve thate problem of traffic congestion. I thinkbelieve the best way to makencourage people to use their cars less areis to provide better public transportations. GThe government can invests more oin many busses and traines so poeople can easily and conveniently gotravel anywhere without using their own cars. They need to first encourage pepoleople to use public transports more through giveby providing incentives, likesuch as lower pricese for useing buses and triains. When more poeople take public transport, slowly they will gradually realized that they don't need to drive cars anymore because public transports are is convenient enuf. Cars will stop usingough. As a result, car usage will decrease slowly, leading to lesser traffic on the roads and lesserreduced polluting by theon from cars. This is a much more fairer and emore effective waysolution than toll charging tolls on road.s. In conclusion, charging extra teolls on busier roads is not a good solution. It will not reduce the number of cars on the road,; it will only makcreate unfairness for some people. The better ways areapproach is to encourage public transports.
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Expert Feedback

The essay presents a clear position against the use of road tolls and suggests an alternative solution of improving public transport, which is a key strength. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited, and the arguments could be elaborated with specific examples to enhance the overall quality. The structure of the essay is generally appropriate, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but the flow of ideas is occasionally disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Critical areas for improvement include addressing grammatical errors, particularly subject-verb agreement and incorrect verb forms, which hinder clarity. Additionally, spelling errors detract from the overall quality, and the writer should focus on using a wider variety of vocabulary to avoid repetition. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving coherence by adding linking phrases, and ensuring proper spelling throughout. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include providing specific examples or case studies to support claims and enhancing the variety of cohesive devices used. The tone of the essay is appropriate for an academic context, maintaining a formal and persuasive style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow of ideas is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. The use of cohesive devices is present but could be more varied and effective. For instance, using linking words such as 'furthermore' or 'in addition' could enhance the logical progression of ideas.
5.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'make people pay for toll' should be 'making people pay for tolls'), incorrect verb forms, and awkward sentence structures. While the writer attempts to use complex sentences, the frequent errors hinder clarity. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic grammatical structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement.
4.5
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'Pepole', 'havve', 'traffiic', 'diffrent', 'allreddy') that detract from the overall quality. The writer demonstrates some range in vocabulary but tends to repeat certain phrases (e.g., 'use their cars less', 'public transport'). To improve, the writer should focus on using a wider variety of vocabulary and ensuring correct spelling.
5.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by presenting a clear position against the use of road tolls and suggesting an alternative solution of improving public transport. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited, and the arguments could be more thoroughly elaborated with specific examples. To improve, the writer could provide more detailed evidence or case studies to support their claims.
5.0

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