The diagram below shows how glass is recycled. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Part 1 (Academic)
5.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

The diagram is illustratinges the process of recycling glass. It haves six steps in total from start to finished product. F The first step of recycling glass areinvolves collecting the waste glass from the public. It comes from many source likes, such as bottle banks and collection points. NThe next step is delivering the collected glass to a recycling plant for further processing. After that, the glass areis sortinged into colours, and impurityies are removed to make ensure the glass areis clean. Then, the glass areis crushed and melted inat a very high tempuerature of 1500°C. After melting, the glass becomes liquid and it can be moulded into any shape. The molten glass is then feed into machines and blown or press toed into the shape of jars and bottles as per requirements. LastThe final step is that the new recycled glass products are sendt to shops for sail.le. In summary, the waste glass areis collected from manyvarious sources, and after cleaning and melting, it is converted into new glass product bys of specific shapes and sizes for resale in the market. MThe most interesting part are thatis how high tempueratures can melt and mould the glass to makcreate new products from waste. The whole recycling process areis simple and can be repeated again and again to save the environment and resources.
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Expert Feedback

The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the glass recycling process, effectively outlining the main steps involved. Key strengths include a logical structure and a general overview of the process. However, critical areas for improvement include grammatical accuracy, particularly with subject-verb agreement, and the use of more varied vocabulary to avoid repetition. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, enhancing coherence with clearer transitions, and ensuring proper subject-verb agreement throughout the text. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include incorporating more specific details about each step and discussing the significance of recycling glass in greater depth. The tone used is appropriate for an academic task, maintaining a formal and informative style.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a basic structure, but the flow of ideas is somewhat disjointed. There are instances of unclear transitions between steps, which can confuse the reader. To improve coherence, the writer could use more cohesive devices and ensure that each step logically follows the previous one. For example, using phrases like 'subsequently' or 'following this' could enhance clarity.
5.5
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The writing contains several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'it have' should be 'it has,' 'the glass are' should be 'the glass is'). There are also awkward constructions that affect clarity. To improve, the writer should focus on using correct grammatical structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement throughout the text.
5.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are some repetitive phrases, such as 'glass' and 'step.' Additionally, there are some spelling errors (e.g., 'tempurature' should be 'temperature,' 'sail' should be 'sale'). To improve, the writer could incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and ensure correct spelling to enhance the overall quality.
6.0
Task Achievement
The response provides a general overview of the glass recycling process, covering the main steps involved. However, it lacks specific details and comparisons that could enhance the summary. To improve, the writer could include more precise information about each step and how they relate to one another, as well as the significance of recycling glass.
6.0

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