Two maps show the road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Part 1 (Academic)
6.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

The two maps is showingllustrate how the access of road to a city hospital has changed frombetween 2007 and 2010. In 2007, the hospital canould be accessed throughvia a main road that connected to the city centere. There was also a parking lot in front of the hospital building. In By 2010, the main road was still therepresent, but it now it havefeatured a public transportation route for bus or something like thates. The parking area in front of the hospital iwas no longer there, having been replaced by a small roundabout. A new parking lot iwas constructed behind the hospital building. Another significant change iwas the addition of a new road that connected to the main road, which provideing an alternative access route to the hospital. TFurthermore, there is now a separate emergency entrance at the back of the hospital, near the new parking lot. In conclusion, the access to the city hospital has undergowent several changes between 2007 and 2010, with the main features being the addiintroduction of a public transportation route, a roundabout replacing the front parking lot, a new road and parking area behind the building, and an emergency entrance. These changes were likely aimed ato improveing overall access and traffic flow to the hospital.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the task by summarising the changes in road access to the city hospital between 2007 and 2010. Key strengths include a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, critical areas for improvement include grammatical accuracy, as several errors were present, and the need for more precise vocabulary, particularly regarding the public transportation route. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, enhancing clarity, and improving transitions between ideas. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include varying sentence structures and expanding the vocabulary range to avoid repetition. The tone used is appropriate for an academic context, maintaining a formal style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some sentences could be better linked to enhance the flow of ideas. For instance, the transition between the description of the main road and the new features could be smoother. Using more cohesive devices would improve the overall coherence.
6.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The writing contains several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('the two maps is showing'), incorrect verb forms ('it have'), and awkward constructions ('has undergo'). While the meaning is generally clear, these errors detract from the overall quality. To improve, the writer should focus on grammatical accuracy and vary sentence structures.
5.5
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there are instances of repetition, such as 'hospital' and 'road.' The phrase 'public transportation route for bus or something like that' is vague and could be more precise. To enhance the score, the writer should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary and avoid informal expressions.
6.5
Task Achievement
The response addresses the task by summarizing the changes in road access to the city hospital between 2007 and 2010. However, it lacks some detail and clarity in certain areas, such as the specific nature of the public transportation route. To improve, the writer could provide more precise descriptions and comparisons of the features on the maps.
6.5

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