"Work from home or work from office"

Part 1 (General)
4.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

DThis essay discusses home working versus office. D working. These days, many peoples do work atfrom home but ut, while others go ato the office place. Both hasve positive and negative points to consider it. Home workers iing offers convenience. NotThere is no need to wake up early, dress clothes,formally, or commute in traffic. Can manage kids and house work better. SIndividuals can manage their children and household tasks more effectively. Additionally, it saves money ion transport. More relaxfulThe work environment, focus better. But human contact is small, feel lonely maybe can be more relaxing, allowing for better focus. However, human contact is limited, which may lead to feelings of loneliness. Self-motivation is neded. Office goers hasalso necessary. On the other hand, office workers benefit from more social interact. Mion. They can meet colleagues, discuss, share ideas, and collaboration happense effectively. Sepearateing work and home life is also possible. butHowever, long travel hours, and costly fuels or train tickets, many distract in can be drawbacks, along with various distractions in the office. Health can be affected due to sitting long, eating outsides, tierdness. Butprolonged sitting, eating out, and fatigue. Nevertheless, learning from seiniors is often better there.in an office setting. In my view, a mixed approach is the best to do. Gosolution. Going to the office a few day, work home some day. Gets a week while working from home on other days allows individuals to enjoy the benefites of both wayarrangements. Companyies should give dprovide this choice to working people. Balance work and life well. Be more happytheir employees to help them balance work and life effectively, leading to greater happiness and produkctive employeity.
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Expert Feedback

The essay presents a clear discussion on the topic of home working versus office working, addressing both sides of the argument. Key strengths include the identification of advantages and disadvantages for each working style, as well as a clear conclusion advocating for a mixed approach. However, critical areas for improvement include the need for more depth in analysis and the use of specific examples to support claims. The tone was informal, which is not suitable for an academic essay, and there were several spelling and grammatical errors that detracted from the overall quality. The structure was basic but could benefit from smoother transitions and a wider range of cohesive devices. Structural changes made include improving the introduction for clarity, enhancing the flow between paragraphs, and correcting grammatical errors. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include expanding on specific examples and using a more varied vocabulary to enhance lexical resource. Overall, the tone used in the original essay was too informal for an academic context, and a more formal tone is recommended for future writing tasks.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the flow of ideas is somewhat disjointed, and transitions between points could be smoother. The use of cohesive devices is limited, which affects the overall clarity. To improve, the writer should focus on linking ideas more effectively and using a wider range of cohesive devices.
5.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'has' instead of 'have'). Sentence structures are often simplistic, and there are several awkward constructions. To improve, the writer should focus on using a greater variety of sentence structures and ensuring grammatical accuracy.
4.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is quite basic and includes several spelling errors (e.g., 'postive', 'relaxful', 'collegues'). There is some repetition of words like 'work' and 'home', which detracts from the overall lexical variety. To enhance this score, the writer should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary and ensure correct spelling.
4.5
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the topic of working from home versus working from the office, presenting both sides of the argument. However, it lacks depth in the analysis and development of ideas. For improvement, the writer could provide more specific examples and elaborate on the points made. Additionally, the tone is informal, which may not be suitable for an academic essay.
5.0

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