You recently stayed at a hotel, and you were disappointed with the quality of service. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter: Describe the problem you encountered. Explain why it was disappointing. Suggest possible improvements.

Part 1 (General)
6.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

Dear Hotel Manager, I am writing to complain to you about the stay I recently had inwould like to express my concerns regarding my recent stay at you'rer hotel. During my two-night visit last weekend, I was very disappointinged with the service I received from your staffs. To begin, when I arrived to check in, the staff at the front desk was quite a rude to me. They did not greet me when I approached at the desk and took a long time to find my reservation. The woman who assisted me seemed irritated by my requests and did not make me feel welcome likeas a guest. This was not a good first impression of the hotel service. Secondly Furthermore, I was further disappointinged when I went to the hotel restaureant for dinner that evening. I waited for over 45 minutes to receive my food after I ordering, even though the restaureant was not busy. When my meal finally came, it was cold and not cooked well. I sent it back to the kitchen but still had to pay for it, which I thought was unfare.ir. To improve this experience, I suggest you provide better training to your staffs on customer service. All guests should be greeted warmly and made to feel welcome upon arrival. You'rer front desk staffs should be efficient andin finding reservations quickly. In the restaureant, the kitchen should prioritise getting meals out in a timely manner and ensure all food is hot and well-prepared before serving to customers. Guests should also not have to pay for meals if there are problems with the food. I hope you will consider this feedback and make changes to improve the service at you'rer hotel. If thisese issues are addressed, I would consider staying at your property again in the future. Sincerely, [Name]
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Expert Feedback

1. Key strengths of the essay include a clear identification of issues and suggestions for improvement, which directly address the task requirements. The structure is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs detailing specific problems, and a conclusion summarising suggestions. 2. Critical areas for improvement include the tone, which could be more formal, and the need for grammatical accuracy. There were several spelling errors and awkward constructions that detracted from the overall quality. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices could enhance the flow between points. 3. Structural changes made include improving the introduction to soften the tone and correcting grammatical errors. Transition words like 'Furthermore' were added to enhance coherence between paragraphs. 4. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include varying vocabulary to avoid repetition and ensuring all sentences are grammatically correct. The writer could also benefit from proofreading to catch any remaining errors. 5. The tone used is generally appropriate for a complaint letter, but it could be improved by using more formal language and expressions to convey concerns without sounding overly harsh.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The letter is generally coherent, with a logical progression of ideas. However, some sentences could be better linked for smoother flow. For instance, using cohesive devices like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition' could enhance the connection between points. The structure is clear, but transitions could be improved.
6.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
There are several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb forms ('was quite a rude'), subject-verb agreement issues ('your staffs' should be 'your staff'), and awkward constructions. While the meaning is generally clear, these errors detract from the overall quality. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for grammatical accuracy and varying sentence structures.
5.5
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate for the context, but there are instances of repetition (e.g., 'disappointing' and 'disappoint'). There are also some spelling errors ('you're' instead of 'your', 'impresion' instead of 'impression', 'restaurent' instead of 'restaurant', 'unfare' instead of 'unfair'). To improve, a wider range of vocabulary could be employed, such as using synonyms for 'disappointing' or 'rude.'
6.0
Task Achievement
The letter addresses the task requirements by describing the problems encountered, explaining why they were disappointing, and suggesting improvements. However, the tone could be more formal, and the response could be more concise. For example, the phrase 'I am writing to complain to you' could be softened to 'I would like to express my concerns.'
6.5

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