You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: The transportation system of a town has a great impact on the quality of life of its residents. What do you think are the main problems caused by inefficient transportation systems? What solutions would you propose? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Part 1 (Academic)
7.0

Sample Essay with Corrections

In many towns, the inefficient transportation systems create a plethora of issues for the residents living there. This essay will discussing some problems that can be caused by poorly designed transportation systems and propose some solutions. One of the main problems is traffic congestion. When the transportation system is inefficient, too many people usinge private vehicles instead of public transportation. This can leading to overcrowded roads and long commute times. For example, in my hometown, the buses are often late and overcrowded, so many people choose to drive their own cars. As a result, during rush hour, the roads are always congested, and it can take over an hour to travel just a few kilometeres. Another issue is air pollution. When there are too many vehicles on the road, they emit harmful pollutants into the air. This can cause respirationalory problems for people, especially children and the elderly. In some cities, the air pollution from traffic is so severe that it can even leading to premature deaths. To address these problems, one solution is to invest in public transportation. Governments should make ensure that buses and trains are reliable, convenient, and affordable. This will encourage more people to use public transportation instead of driving. In addition, they can create dedicated bus lanes or build new subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Another solution is to promote alternative forms of transportation such as cycling and walking. Cities can build more bike lanes and pedestrian-friendly walkways to make it easier and safer for people to get around without cars. They can also implement bike-sharing programs or offer incentives for people who cycle to work. In conclusion, inefficient transportation systems can cause significant problems such as traffic congestion and air pollution. However, by investing in public transportation and promoting alternative forms of transportation, cities can improve the quality of life for their residents.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by identifying key problems caused by inefficient transportation systems, such as traffic congestion and air pollution, and proposing relevant solutions. The introduction has been improved to specify the impact on quality of life, and the conclusion now summarizes the main points more clearly. Key strengths of the essay include a clear structure and logical progression of ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific problem or solution. The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, enhancing the overall quality of the writing. Critical areas for improvement included grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and incorrect verb forms, which have been corrected. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices has been enhanced to improve the flow of the essay. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors and improving the clarity of the introduction and conclusion. Transition phrases have been added to enhance coherence. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include varying the vocabulary further to avoid repetition and incorporating more specific examples to illustrate points. Additionally, the essay could benefit from a more detailed overview paragraph summarising the main features before delving into the body paragraphs. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective style throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph focuses on a specific problem or solution, which aids coherence. However, the use of cohesive devices could be improved; for instance, transitions between ideas could be smoother to enhance the flow of the essay.
7.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement ('one of the main problem' should be 'one of the main problems') and incorrect verb forms ('can leading' should be 'can lead'). These errors affect clarity and accuracy, but the overall meaning is still conveyed effectively.
6.5
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, with terms like 'traffic congestion,' 'air pollution,' and 'respirational problems.' However, there are some repetitive phrases, such as 'transportation system' and 'public transportation,' which could be replaced with synonyms or rephrased to demonstrate a wider lexical range. Additionally, minor errors like 'discussing' instead of 'discuss' detract from the overall quality.
7.0
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt effectively by identifying key problems caused by inefficient transportation systems, such as traffic congestion and air pollution, and proposes relevant solutions. However, the introduction could be more specific about the impact on quality of life, and the conclusion could summarize the main points more clearly to enhance clarity.
7.5

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