You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words. The preventing and reducing global environmental damage lies with politicians, as there are very little the individuals can do about this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Part 2
6.5

Sample Essay with Corrections

Nowadays, the environmental damage is becoming more and more servere, and it has become a global problems. Some people think that only governments and politicians can solve this problemissue, because individuals have very little power to change the situation. I partly agree with this opinion. On the one hand, I believe that politicians play an important role in protecting the environment. Firstly, they have the power to make laws and regulations to restrict the behaiviour of companies and individuals whichthat can damage the environment. For example, the government can set strict standards on wastewater discharge for factories, and fine the companies if they violate the rules. Secondly, politicians can allocate more budgets to support the development of clean energy and technology, such as solar power and wind power, which can reduce the consumption of fossil fuels and carbon emissions. Thirdly, the government can also raise people's awareness of environmental protection through education and publicity. On the other hand, I think individuals also have responsibilities and can make contributions to protect the environment. In daily life, everyone can take some small actions, such as saving water and electricity, using public transportations instead of private cars, and sorting garbage for recycling. These behaviours may seem insignificant, but if all people do iteveryone does them, the effect will be huge. Moreover, individuals can also influence others by setting good examples and spreading the idea of environmental protection. For instance, if someone always brings his own shopping bag instead of using plastic bags, and explains the reason to others, he may persuade more people to do the same thing. In addition, individuals can also participate in some environmental organizations and activities to make their voices heard by the government and society. In conclusion, I believe that both governments and individuals should take actions to protect the environment. Politicians have the power and resources to make policies and invest in green projects, while individuals can change their lifestyles and influence others. Only when everyone works together, can we solve the global environmental problems.
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Expert Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the roles of both politicians and individuals in environmental protection, presenting a clear position that partly agrees with the statement. Key strengths include a well-organized structure with clear paragraphs focusing on specific aspects of the argument. However, critical areas for improvement include enhancing the development of ideas with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the implications of individual actions. Additionally, the use of varied cohesive devices could improve the flow of the essay. Structural changes made include correcting grammatical errors, improving vocabulary variety, and enhancing transitions between ideas. Suggestions for further improvements not implemented in the corrected version include incorporating more complex sentence structures and reducing repetition of key terms. The tone used is appropriate for an academic essay, maintaining a formal and objective stance throughout.

Detailed Scores

Coherence And Cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, with clear paragraphs that each focus on a specific aspect of the argument. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For instance, using more varied cohesive devices could improve the flow of the essay. Phrases like 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand' are effective, but additional linking words could enhance coherence.
7.0
Grammatical Range And Accuracy
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors and awkward constructions (e.g., 'it become a global problems,' 'individual have very little power'). These errors affect clarity and accuracy. More complex sentence structures could be employed to enhance the grammatical range.
6.0
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary used is appropriate for the topic, with some good phrases such as 'clean energy' and 'carbon emission.' However, there are instances of repetition, such as the word 'government' and 'politicians,' which could be varied. Additionally, there are some spelling errors (e.g., 'servere' should be 'severe,' 'behaivior' should be 'behavior') that detract from the overall lexical quality.
6.5
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the roles of both politicians and individuals in environmental protection. It presents a clear position, agreeing partly with the statement. However, the development of ideas could be enhanced with more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the implications of individual actions.
7.0

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